Heated Moments: some pretty cool scriptures

Do you, at times, “lose” it with your kids…especially if they continue being disobedient?


I do. (I have to sadly admit) There are moments when they drive me totally mad; moments where I get SO angry. And I have really been asking God for help.

Here’s His answer: (It’s so totally cool!)

Jas 3:13 Who among you is wise and understanding? (what I desperately want to be during these moments) Let him show by his noble conduct that his actions are done humbly (meekness) and wisely.

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So what does NOBLE conduct (wise actions) look like?

Jas 3:17 However, the wisdom that comes from above (in other words, GOD’S WISDOM) is first of all:


pure, (believing the best) then

peace-loving, (peaceable; maintaining unity)

gentle (a soft answer turns away wrath but a harsh word stirs up anger Prov 15:1),

willing to yield, (LISTEN, open to reason, not “thou shalt listen coz I am the mom”, understanding, wanting to get to the root of the issue) Pro 18:13 Whoever answers before listening is both foolish and shameful.

full of compassion (mercy, kind, concerned) and

good deeds (how we interact, body language, word usage), and

without a trace of partiality or hypocrisy (sincere, treating all equal, from a place of humility- knowing that I am not perfect either).


Jas 3:18 And a harvest of righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace. (doing discipline should result in peace not more strife.)

Psa 37:8 -11 Refrain from anger, and forsake wrath! Fret not yourself; it tends only to evil…


Rom 12:17 Repay no one evil (disobedient kids) for (another) evil (like losing it with your kids)l, but give thought to do what is honorable in the sight of all.


The word "thought"...also meaning to consider in advance- in other words, be prepared for dealing with these situations, to excercise the mind, to percieve, understand... where possible, it is better to pre-empt the heated moment, but when it is not possible then...

be still [and know that I am God], wait patiently, be meek! In quietness and trust [in God] is your strength. Isa 30:15)…..

…and the meek shall inherit the land (eg. doing discipline with a tender, kind heart, consistently) and delight themselves in abundant peace (disciplined, obedient, delightful kids :)

“Losing it” helps no-one. Not even yourself. Keep calm during those heated moments, THINK (prepare oneself for these situations, trust God; sometimes WAIT) and let your foundation be to believe the best (not, “why did you do that?” when you aren’t even sure they did it), then gentle with a soft calm voice, be open to reason (I am not saying you should argue with your children, but give them an opportunity to explain their behaviour… it is often (but, yes, not always) important to try and find the reason for their actions)… then discipline them, not out of anger, but with mercy and in humility

Pro_15:33 … and humility comes before honor.

Pro_18:12 … but humility comes before honor.

Pro_22:4 The reward for humility … is riches and honor and life.

It takes Humility to treat our children with kindness and grace when they don’t really “deserve” it. (Mom, you know what I’m talking about. Pride, our own sinful nature, wants to enforce respect at all cost and with any means necessary.)

But like Jesus, saying on the cross “Father forgive them for they don’t know what they are doing”, may we too live in forgiving affection toward our children.

1Co 16:14 Let all that you do be done in love (affection).


This study has helped me a lot but I am nowhere near perfection. Only God can sustain me in these heated moments. When I rely on the Holy Spirit and am attentive to His guidance day-to-day, then I find that I am more gracious, understanding and kind, even when it comes to discipline and I am more resistant to the schemes of darkness: I will NOT allow their outbursts of disobedience to offend and harden my heart.

Awesome stuff!