I want the Money, Honey

“The best things in life are free, but you can give them to the birds and bees I want your money” The best things in life are NOT free… the best things take work; dedication to obtain. It demands choices to be made that, quite frankly, make money the easier commodity to come by. Let’s take reputation for example… or a great marriage or obedient children or…..

The Word is clear that there are things far more precious and worthy to live for than money. Prov11:16 A kindhearted woman gains respect, but ruthless men gain only wealth

But the reality is that we need money to live. And money in itself is not the root of evil… the problem is not in getting money. The problem is how to live on the money you get. The problem is the LOVE of money- that is the root of evil (see 1 Tim 6:10).

Often, as wives, and especially stay at home moms, we disregard the issue of money as not applicable to us. But it is, because of three things: We run a household and have to manage a lot of monetary transactions much like running a small business; finances are one of the main reasons for conflict between husband and wife, and our perspective on finances will influence how our children will manage money.

“I work all day, I work all night to pay the bills I have to pay…ain’t it sad”

Sound familiar? Actually, working is not such a bad thing. The problem is when bad financial decisions leads to excessive debts and paying the bills become your new slave master… perhaps it is time to re-evaluate your lifestyle.

Let’s take a look at the Word and God's perspective on money and moms- Proverbs 31: A woman who fears the Lord

For me, the essence of Proverbs 31 is stewardship. The last verse is a summary of sorts: “give her the reward she has earned and let her works bring her praise…”

The lady of Proverbs 31 is not a woman bent on becoming rich. No, she is already rich (in Christ- fearing the Lord V30) and out of that confidence she works hard, and as a result she has had the opportunity to trade with ships, selling garments she has made.

Interestingly, (and I highlight this) the piece first mentions her husband and her responsibility toward him, then the responsibility of providing for the household well (working with willing hands V13) and then only it mentions her other interests or hobbies... The point: you can be the greatest worker; the best steward but as a wife, a lot of our inheritance is locked up in our husbands. (Don’t love money, rather love your man!)

How well are you taking care of your man? 

Perhaps you should ask him...

Money, Money, Money

Let’s look at a few underlying principles in Prov 31:

1. 
   
   V16 She considers a field and buys it- not impulsive, probably had to save to buy it delayed gratification… waiting, making an emotionless decision….

The world lives by a “buy now pay later” motto…. Actually it is buy now pay later at three times the cost (if not more) - ok ok, perhaps that is a bit OTT, but you get the point, right?

Consider (plan) purchases rather than buying impulsive. If you can manage your own cash flow… well, you can manage a company! (Faithful in little; faithful in much) Don’t become a plastic fanatic. Practical tip: if you feel “you want it all and you want it now”… you don’t. Go home. Rethink and then make an informed decision that you won’t regret later.

How do I know I have the love of money? (honestly, I think we all struggle with this fleshly desire.)

1 Ti 6:9 People who want to get rich (or look rich- that’s us all, to some extent) fall into temptation (to buy on credit; live beyond their means) and a trap (yes, the credit card companies trap and lure you with all kinds of nice promises) and into many foolish and harmful desires (so you buy like a whole wardrobe on credit) that plunge men into ruin and destruction (now you have to pay back a lot of money, you stress every night, have stomach ulcers and cannot even enjoy a coffee at a restaurant because of this gnawing and knowing at the back of your mind)

Ecc 5:10 whoever loves money never has enough money (always having to pay something off or get something new…), whoever loves wealth is never satisfied with his income

So, every time I get into temptation- I tell myself: its gonna burn… I will not submit to this fleshly desire. I will beat my body into submission (in the words of Paul) ;) I will not give in to the love of money!!! Read Cor 10:13 on temptation…

There is always a way out of temptation: If you cannot work with your credit card, cut it up. If you are always struggling due to clothes and other retail accounts- close them immediately! And if you have to pay back on those accounts, start with the account that you owe the least and be determined in paying it off as soon as possible, setting aside a decided amount each month to pay it off. Once one account is paid off, focus on another and so forth.

The word also says: Pray, so you do not fall into temptation- so when you see something you really like but can’t afford. Tell God about it 

2. V16 Out of her earnings she plants a vineyard- she does not simply waste her money. She “plows” her money back into something that can provide future income. Again, out of her earnings- I believe it refers to having had to save.

She doesn’t merely use HER money on herself, she is wise in thinking toward the future. Instead of moaning at your husband for not taking the family on that dream vacation… why don’t you start saving for it?

Some women might argue and say that they don’t earn anything….this piece is also about good management of money; not necessarily only your own earnings. It is about making the most with the money you get… whether it be for groceries, clothes or whatever…

For example: instead of buying fresh herbs each month, rather buy a herb plant…. But here’s the catch: don’t buy it in the first month… no, you must first save to buy it for the plant is more expensive than a packet of herbs. So, for one month you will have to go without herbs but then….

As women, we buy the plant first and then we see future savings and think we’ve saved! We haven’t…. in actual fact, for this month, we’ve created cash flow issues. (just a silly example, but I hope you get the idea) Purchases is a trade-off. Money is limited to a certain amount. When it is finished, there is a zero. Nada. Nothing. (the world will make you believe there is more than zero. Minus means you have to pay it back, again, at a higher rate).

Everything in life is a trade-off. Especially with money- called opportunity costs (what you could’ve also done with the money)

practical tip: to really see the trade offs- put it on paper!

This is why it is crucial to have a budget… plan, plan, plan.

V18 She sees that her trading is profitable- Apply wisdom (Prov 4:6 Do not forsake wisdom, she will protect you)

How can you know whether your “trading” (buying groceries, whatever) is profitable if you don’t have some kind of budget and do some sort of recon?

Also, in V27 she watches over the affairs of her household

Know what your cash flow is like. LIVE WITHIN YOUR MEANS! Even below it, so you can be generous for the means of others as well

Like Abraham, God blessed him, in order for him to bless and be a blessing to others as well

A good idea is to split the month into four weeks and then to have an amount per week to buy your groceries etc. with.

Have a “hosting budget” for the month… for when guests come… this might vary, again, it is a trade off: are you going to host once the month and go all out or rather host more often but perhaps not quite to your “standard”... sometimes you might be able to buy flowers and other times you'll need to think a bit and work a bit harder and think more creative, but the woman in Prov 31 (and that means you, lovely) does not eat the bread of idleness!

3. V27 she does not eat the bread of idleness. Anything worthwhile is going to take work and discipline (and most probably a lot of patience). But work is GOOD!! Idleness is really bad. (and I’m not referring to resting- no, I am referring to laziness) Prov 10:4 Lazy hands make a man poor but diligent hands bring wealth

Be creative in your cooking. Rather make or bake than buy the ready-made stuff. Know what is in your groceries cupboard. Do what your hand finds to do…. Prov 12:11

Often I’ll see what I have in the cupboard in the morning and then I’ll plan what I need to make ahead so by the time I have to make supper, I am mentally prepared and know exactly what to do.

So, your kids don’t have the newest toys…. Be creative! You will be surprised how imaginative kids can be. (Besides, babies are most happy with a few plastic containers from the kitchen)

Again, LIVE WITHIN YOUR MEANS...

4. V20 She opens her hand to the poor, she reaches out her hand to the needy

Generosity is a lifestyle that permeates your quality of life (so even though there is the “give and you shall receive”… by simply giving, you reap much more in terms of not taking earthly things such as money, material wealth etc. too serious- it has huge spiritual and emotional spin offs) and in living generous, we naturally show our children a better way of life (not a me-mine-myself world)

I love the way Prov 31 explains generosity…. It doesn’t say “she gives money”, no it says she opens her hands- for me it pretty much means she shares with others (see Heb 13V16). It could be finances… it could be time… it could be a delicious casserole…. It could be something else she made….

Ps 112:5 Good will come to him who is generous

5. Lastly, if this is an area that you need to get victory over, I strongly urge you to go and do your own study of it in the scriptures, go find out for yourself what the Word says… allow God to speak to you directly through his infallible Word! Write it down. Stick it up, on the fridge, in the bathroom! Ask around, find out what other ladies do… how other ladies do things, perhaps you might hear something helpful and useful... never forget the counsel of people who have proven themselves good stewards over time (as the body of Christ we are here to edify en encourage each other!).  
   

Heb 13 with the heading- Sacrifices pleasing to God- V5 “Keep your life free from the love of money and be content with what you have...” again, LIVE WITHIN YOUR MEANS

“...for HE has said: 'I wil never leave you NOR FORSAKE you'. So we can CONFIDENTLY say, 'The Lord is my helper...!'”